Does your child speak a different language? Sometimes they wager for your attention, and other times they ignore you completely. Sometimes they are filled with gratitude and affection, and other times they seem totally indifferent. Attitude. Behavior. Development. Everything depends on the love relationship between you and your child. When children feel loved, they do their best. But how can you make sure your child feels loved?
Since 1992, Dr. Gary Chapman’s best-selling book “The 5Love Languages” has helpedmillions of couples develop stronger, more fulfilling relationships by teaching them to speak each others’ love language. Each child, too, expresses and receives love through one of five different communication styles. And your love language may be totally different from that of your child. While you are doing all you can to show your child love, he may be hearing it as something completely opposite. Discover your child’s primary language and learn what you can do to effectively convey unconditional feelings of respect, affection, and commitment that will resonate in your child’s emotions and behavior.
What a fantastic book!! The 5 Love Languages of Children discusses the many ways in which we can effectively and truly allow our children to feel loved. We may tell our children we love them, yet we do not speak to them in ways that truly allow them to feel that love.
This book was mentioned to me as I as discussing motherhood with my family’s adoption assessor. I have heard about the book and seen it but didn’t see a reason until this point to read it. I read baby books whilst I was pregnant with my first son, but since having him have come to realise that we parent in ways that are best for our children and our family. This book speaks exactly to that and much more!
The authors of this book concentrate on love and how love is the foundation for parenting. We know this, but do we know how to speak each other’s love language? Knowing how to make our children feel loved is important. Each and every one of the 5 love languages should be spoken to our children, however once we figure out which language our child speaks we can focus on that love language so that they truly feel loved.
Personally, as a mum of two, I felt that my eldest son at times struggled when his brother came into the family and still does. Being an only child for 3.5 years and now adjusting to having a brother has been a big change for him. Reading this book, it is obvious that his love language is quality time. I loved reading each of the love languages and realising that I use each one with my sons, however the ideas presented here are an extension on showing love in everyday situations, building on the ways that we can truly show how much we love our kids.
Although we have quality time as a family and each day my eldest does with me, he had been missing this quality time with his dad. Upon increasing this time we have seen huge differences, including him wanting his dad to read stories at bedtime instead of just me. It is beautiful to see his smile even more and less tears about the little things. This book has made a big difference in such a short space of time. As for my youngest son, I feel that his love language may be words of affirmation; his whole face lights up when we say ‘well done’ in Korean. As he grows up we will learn more which his love language is.
The 5 Love Languages for Children is a book that will not stay on the shelf. I will be leaving it out to read over and remind myself of how I can increase certain love languages, making our sons feel truly loved. This is the best parenting book I have read, because it is valuable for the longterm. With love in their hearts and feeling our love towards them, I hope that my sons will grow up happy, content and connected to us and to God.